Imagine the Possibilities instead of the Problems

Start imagining the possibilities instead of the problems.

Our brains are wired to keep us safe and comfortable, so it’s natural that our brains go to the negative thoughts.  It’s actually trying to protect us, to keep us home on the sofa watching Netflix.  The brain does not want us to do hard things.

It's important to give equal airtime to the possibilities along with the problems.

It must begin with awareness.

Here is the problem.

No one taught us to pay attention to our thoughts or that our thoughts are choices.

But they are.

Turning negative narratives into productive stories is not easy.  (I coach on this with every client.)

It’s important to remember that our thoughts are simply sentences in our brain.  They are stories we’ve created even though we are often completely unaware.  Many of our thoughts feel like absolute facts.

If your thoughts are stories that you’ve come up with in your brain, consider re-creating those stories and imagining the positive possibilities…. On purpose.

What area in your life would you like to get better results?  Your marriage, your finances, your job, your health?

Start by taking an inventory of your thoughts about it.  We call it a thought download in life coaching.  Spend 5-10 minutes writing down all of your thoughts about the topic.  Do not edit or judge what you write down.  Be honest with yourself.  Do this every day for a week. Then try it for 3 weeks… Make it a habit.

I can promise that you have negative thoughts that are getting in your way.  Negative thoughts lead to negative results- every time.

Remember no one taught us that our thoughts are choices and that our thoughts are just that.  They are rarely facts.  When you look at what you’ve written, circle the statements that are 100% factual.  That means your husband, your kids and everyone else must agree that it is a fact.

I had a client that shared with me that her boss was awful, verbally abusive, cussed all the time and was condescending to women.  I’m sorry to say that, as real as all of this feels, these are not facts.  These are thoughts, opinions, interpretations.  The only fact she shared was when she told me that he ‘ dropped the F bomb to her in conversation.’

If you are going to think the worst, it’s important to think of the possibilities.

When you spend time thinking about anything important to you… your relationship with someone, your job, parenting, ask yourself a few questions to consider the possibilities.  Take 5 minutes to write down these answers as well.

What is going well?

How can I make this better?

What if it was meant to happen so something even better could evolve?

Answer these questions and think about them as often as you think of the negative.

Change your thinking and you will change your results.  Spend time thinking positive thoughts at least as often as the negative.  This client reported back to me weeks later that something had shifted with her boss once she worked on this.  Without having a difficult conversation or going to HR, which she had considered, things began to change for the positive.

If you’re going to tell yourself a story, make it a story that serves you.