It’s not too late. You’re not too old… A life coach's perspective for moms in midlife

Is an empty nest looming?  If you’re like me, you don’t love the term midlife, but here we are.  Your family has been your priority for years and suddenly life is beginning to feel different.  I have 2 kids out of high school and one just starting high school.  And, with a college freshman who’s only been gone a few months (my tears have not even dried), I feel like I’ve had the conversation countless times this year.  I’m asked where he’s going to college and what he wants to do? 

Funny thing is when I tell people he doesn't know what he wants to do, they say they don’t either.  I hear, “I’m trying to figure out what to do with my life now.”

I have talked to countless moms that find themselves in a new phase in life.  Kids don’t need us as much.  We have more time on our hands.  Some of us want to make career changes, some of us are not sure what we want to do next  & some have an idea but haven’t dared tell anyone or started pursuing it.  

“It’s too late. I’m too old.  Noone will hire me.  I don’t have any experience.  I have no idea what I want to do.  Now what?”  These are just a few of the things I hear women saying.

Those are simply thoughts.  They are thoughts that your brain is offering you, because your brain is wired to keep you safe.  Your brain will continue to offer you thoughts that will keep you on the sidelines or on the couch watching Netflix.  Your brain would prefer that you pour the 2nd glass of wine rather than go to bed so you can get up early to workout.

The way you think about midlife will determine the results you have in midlife.  If you think midlife is a time of uncertainty, you will feel unsure & will find evidence that you don’t know what to do.

If you think of this time in life as a new beginning with many opportunities, you will feel excited and hopeful and will find evidence for all the new opportunities and experiences.

Think of it as a time of rediscovery and, perhaps, reinvention instead of a time of uncertainty.

It can be a great time for soul searching and deciding how you want to live and what you want to do with your next chapter.

You can feel better.

You can feel happier.

You can feel healthier.

You can feel more purpose.

You can make more money.

You can make yourself a priority again.

You can transform yourself.

And there’s actually a formula for it.

Thoughts create our feelings. 

I began learning tools from a life coach several years ago and it changed my life so much I became a life coach too.  I used to be a victim of my circumstances and my mood was so often reflective of what was going on around me.  I felt like I had no control in my life.

No one taught me that growing up.  But, once you learn it and begin to become aware of your thoughts, you can learn to change them if needed.  If we don’t pay attention, we will continue to think all sorts of nonsense.  We will feel so much unnecessary pain and suffering. 

It’s not the weather, our age, the traffic, what our husband said to us or what our kids did last weekend that makes us feel anything.  It’s what we are making all of that mean that makes us feel so bad.

The thoughts we think most create our beliefs.

Therefore, it’s super important that we begin to notice our thoughts and become aware of them.

So, instead of thinking,  “It’s too late. I’m too old,” decide you want to think otherwise.  Decide you want to believe otherwise.

Decide to think…

Now is the perfect time.

Say it often enough that you believe it with all your heart.

Now is the time.  

I have all the skills I need and I know how to get new skills.  

I’m not afraid to try new things.

I’m excited for what’s next.

This is my time.

I can figure anything out.

I’m ready to make myself a priority.

I’ll start the business, get the job, make time for yoga…. Whatever you want.  

Make it happen.

Once you decide to think these things, you will feel much different.  

When you think “I can figure anything out,” you feel confident and empowered.  You feel motivated to figure it out.  When you feel motivated, you take action to figure it out.  Your results change.

When you think “it’s too late. I’m too old,” you feel defeated and you don’t take action.  You will look for evidence that it’s too late and you will find it.

Make the decision to look for the evidence you want to find.  Make the decision that it’s not too late and look for evidence.  You will find it. If you read this article, sign up for weekly life coaching tips. Just share your info on the link on my website.